你做過的最困難的事情是什么?（三）

Angela Ten
A year ago today, at age 33, I found out I had cancer.
After going over the pathology reports, and letting me know that the type of cancer I have is a “rare and aggressive” kind, my doctor said I needed to get my uterus and ovaries removed right away.
I will never have kids of my own.
Before she referred me to a specialist, she suggested I start writing a journal as a keepsake for my parents in case I do not make it.
Trying to keep it together as my mother (typically not a crier), sniffed and tried to keep her tears at bay sitting next to me, hearing all of this, was the start of the hardest thing I have ever done.
Over the last year, the word “aggressive” was used at me a lot. Not only was my kind of cancer aggressive, my treatment plan was even more aggressive. Due to me being “so young,” they thought my body should be able to tolerate it.
I ended up in the Emergency Room during my first chemo treatment.
I can go on about how hard it was to get through the chemo and radiation (both external and internal), but maybe I’ll save that for a different answer on Quora.
Instead I want to focus more on how I coped with this hardship.
Being 33, single with no kids, living with my parents during this was the best option.
Over the last year, I have read a lot of blogs and postings on Quora on people who were/are dealing with cancer. While everyone had different experiences and stories, there seemed to be one constant factor. They all seemed to have a significant other by their side, helping them through their difficult times.

一年前的今天，33歲的我發(fā)現(xiàn)自己得了癌癥。
在看過病理報告后，我的醫(yī)生告訴我，我患的癌癥是一種“罕見和侵襲性”的癌癥，我需要立即切除子宮和卵巢。
我永遠不會有自己的孩子。
在她把我介紹給專家之前，她建議我開始寫一本日記，作為給我父母的紀念品，以防我做不到。
我的母親(通常不會哭)坐在我旁邊，聽著這一切，努力讓自己振作起來，努力忍住眼淚，這是我做過的最艱難的事情的開始。
在過去的一年里，““激進”這個詞經(jīng)常用在我身上。我的癌癥不僅具有攻擊性，我的治療計劃甚至更具攻擊性。由于我“這么年輕”，他們認為我的身體應該能夠承受。
在第一次化療期間，我被送進了急診室。
我可以繼續(xù)講述化療和放療（包括外部和內(nèi)部）有多難，但也許我會在Quora上留下不同的答案。
相反，我想更多地關注我是如何應對這種困難的。
33歲，單身，沒有孩子，在這期間和父母住在一起是最好的選擇。
在過去的一年里，我在Quora上讀到了很多關于癌癥患者的博客和帖子。雖然每個人都有不同的經(jīng)歷和故事，但似乎有一個不變的因素。他們似乎都有一個重要的另一半在身邊，幫助他們度過難關。

I spent quite a lot of time reflecting over this. Who is going to want me now? I have lost 2 major features as a woman. First, my ability to reproduce. Second, my once long and beautiful hair. Not to mention that I am now a “cancer patient.”
I had to toy with the idea that there was a possibility that I would be single for the rest of my life.
In order to keep myself from feeling too down on myself, I worked as much as I could throughout treatment. Besides taking a few weeks off to recover from surgery and a few days here and there to rest from just being exhausted, I somehow managed to work on a full-time basis.
Home was where I could stop pretending everything was just fine and dandy. I could drop the fake smiles and I could be as crabby and demanding as I wanted and my parents would put up with it. Home was where I rested in bed, trying not to focus on the fact that I didn’t have that special someone like everyone else had, and my father coming in with fresh fruit he had washed, peeled, and cut into manageable sizes for me to eat. Home was where my mother would get up early every morning to prepare me a healthy breakfast and a lunch for me to take to work so I didn’t have to worry about it. She also went to every single one of my treatments and doctor’s appointments. Mom also knitted me hats. Lots of them... when my hair left me. Home was where my father would give me gentle back rubs, followed by comforting hugs, when treatment was taking a toll on my body.
After awhile, I stopped feeling sorry for myself that I did not have a significant other by my side. I realized I had two. At an age where I was the one who should be worrying about their health, my parents were in constant fear of mine. Yet, somehow, their quiet and steady strength guided me through my treatments. I was able to keep it together because they were able to keep it together.
A year ago today, I found out I had cancer. A year later, here I am, in remission, knowing fully well that there is something even harder I will have to face eventually... the passing of my parents, my two significant others. I will forever be in awe of their unconditional love.
Thank you for reading. This is my first answer on Quora, having lurked for over a year.

我花了很多時間來思考這個問題?，F(xiàn)在誰還想要我?作為一個女人，我失去了兩個主要特征。首先，我的繁殖能力。第二，我曾經(jīng)又長又美的頭發(fā)。更別提我現(xiàn)在是一個“癌癥病人”了。
我不得不胡思亂想，我可能會單身一輩子。
為了不讓自己感覺太沮喪，我在整個治療過程中盡我所能地工作。除了花幾周的時間從手術中恢復，還有幾天的時間在這里和那里休息，我還設法全職工作。
家是我可以停止假裝一切都很好的地方。我可以放下假笑，可以隨心所欲地暴躁和苛求，我的父母也會容忍。家是我躺在床上的地方，盡量不去關注“我不再擁有其他人擁有的那個功能”，我的父親帶著新鮮的水果進來了，他已經(jīng)洗好了，去了皮，切成了我可以吃的大小。家是我媽媽每天早起為我準備健康的早餐和午餐，讓我?guī)еド习嗟牡胤?，這樣我就不用擔心了。她還參加了我的每一次治療和醫(yī)生預約。媽媽還給我織了帽子。當我的頭發(fā)離開我的時候，我有很多帽子。在家里，當治療對我的身體造成傷害時，父親會溫柔地按摩我的背部，然后安慰并擁抱我。
過了一段時間，我不再為身邊沒有另一半而感到難過。我意識到我有兩個重要的人。在我這個年紀，我本應該擔心他們的健康，我的父母一直卻擔心我的健康。然而，不知何故，它們安靜而穩(wěn)定的力量引導我完成了治療。我之所以能夠保持鎮(zhèn)定，是因為他們能夠保持鎮(zhèn)定。
一年前的今天，我發(fā)現(xiàn)自己得了癌癥。一年后，我在這里，病情有所緩解，但我清楚地知道，最終我將不得不面對一些更困難的事情……我的兩個重要的人——父母的去世。我將對他們無條件的愛永遠敬畏。
感謝你的閱讀。這是我在Quora上潛伏了一年多的第一個答案。

I wanted to thank all of the Quora users who took the time to read, comment, and upvote this answer. I never expected such an overwhelming response and support for my first answer. I have noticed a few people who commented wanting an upxe, so I will happily oblige!
I am still in remission and remain cancer free. I get scanned and checked every 6 months and visit all of my doctors at a similar rate. They are all optimistic about my progress and prognosis. It is still frightening each time I lie there when I am getting scanned, however. With all cancer survivors, the all too familiar “what if it’s back” feeling is just something you never get used to.
My 2 significant others are doing well. My father struggles with some minor health issues here and there and isn’t the healthiest, but turning 70 years old this year, I still think he is better off than most his age. He goes swimming at the gym everyday. My mother is an avid ballroom dancer and has been (as a hobby) for the last 10 years or so. This has kept her in good shape and probably in better shape than I am. She keeps my father on his (tippy) toes. Now that I am in better health, have moved out, and no longer require them to worry (as much), they have taken the opportunity to remodel their house, travel, and overall just enjoying their well-deserved retirement.
The struggle continues to find my 3rd significant other though. While it isn’t something I absolutely need, that romantic connection with someone not related to you is not to be passed over either. Love really is a beautiful thing.
Over the last 3 years, I have tried to put myself out there more by putting up profiles on online dating sites, acquired a job that requires more social skills, entered a Master’s program part-time at a major university (completely paid for by my work), and tried to be open in meeting more people in general. Although I get impatient at times at this process, my experience with cancer has led me to develop a thicker skin and rejection no longer has such a crippling effect on me. I have also experienced heartbreak, and while probably one of the most painful things I’ve felt since my cancer diagnosis, I believe it was a good learning experience.
The quest continues and I am still hopeful that I can one day be on the giving end of that unconditional love I experienced from my first 2 significant others.

我想感謝所有花時間閱讀、評論和點贊的Quora用戶。我從來沒有想到我的第一個答案會得到如此強烈的反響和支持。我注意到一些人評論說想要我更新答案，所以我很樂意幫忙！
我遠離癌癥，仍處于病情緩解期。我每6個月做一次掃描和檢查，并以類似的頻率去看我所有的醫(yī)生。他們對我的病情和預后都很樂觀。然而，每次我躺在那里接受掃描時，還是很害怕。對于所有癌癥幸存者來說，那種再熟悉不過的“如果它又回來了怎么辦”的感覺是你永遠不會習慣的。
我的兩個重要的人都做得很好。我父親不時地與一些小健康問題作斗爭，他不算最健康的，但今年70歲了，我仍然認為他比大多數(shù)同齡人過得更好，他每天都去健身房游泳。我母親是一個狂熱的交際舞愛好者，這種愛好在過去的10年一直持續(xù)著；這讓她保持了良好的狀態(tài)，可能比我的狀態(tài)更好。她使我父親時刻保持警惕?，F(xiàn)在我身體好了，搬了出去，不再需要他們擔心(那么多)，他們利用這個機會重新裝修房子，旅行，總的來說，享受他們應得的退休生活。
盡管如此，我仍在努力尋找我的第三個重要的另一半。雖然這不是我絕對需要的，但與一個與你無關的人建立浪漫聯(lián)系也不能被忽略，愛情真的是一件美好的事情。
在過去的3年里，我通過在網(wǎng)上交友網(wǎng)站上發(fā)布個人資料，獲得了一份需要更多社交技能的工作，在一所主要大學攻讀了兼職碩士課程(全部由我的工作支付)，并試著以開放的態(tài)度與更多的人見面。雖然在這個過程中我有時會感到不耐煩，但我患癌癥的經(jīng)歷讓我心胸變得更開闊，拒絕對我來說不再有那么嚴重的影響。我也經(jīng)歷過心碎，雖然這可能是我被診斷為癌癥以來感受到的最痛苦的事情之一，但我相信這是一次很好的學習經(jīng)歷。
我的探索還在繼續(xù)，我仍然希望有一天我能從我的前兩個重要的人那里得到無條件的愛。

Piyush Goel
Saying No to her..
It was a Friend’s party, my crush walks in(we were best friends also), looking ravishing and mind boggling, never have i seen this sexy avatar of her. My heart skipped a few beats, obviously.
Result: My heartbeat elevated and sweat started oozing , i found it difficult to even hold a conversation up with her.
In middle of the party, sometime when my stats read normal, she got drunk, turned towards me, face to face, looked into my eyes and asked if she can kiss me…
WTF?????
Two little guy appear on my shoulder and started murmuring, I was stunned, i replayed the scene in my mind, just to be sure, she asked again ‘Can I ?’
My knees got weak, Hell yes, so much i wanted that to happen, i almost dreaded of the words coming out next of my mouth, with strange determination and heavy heart I Said No.
Exactly, I said no to the girl I've been dreaming about (What a moron, right?).
Stating that she is too drunk, and may not be taking it in good spirit once her sober state returns.She got saddened, tried pursuing me, but i was unmoved.
The Little guy on my shoulder (The one in red) took out the bazooka and shoot my head off.
PS: After revealing the same incident to her, the very next day, she scolded me and said i shouldn’t have declined the opportunity.
EDIT: Since everyone is asking this, The kiss never happened , Also it’s been almost 4 years to this incident, so no hopes now!!

對她說“不”。
那是一個朋友的聚會，我的暗戀對象走進來（我們也是最好的朋友），看起來很迷人，令人難以置信，我從來沒有見過她這個性感的樣子。很明顯，我的心跳加快了幾次。
結果:我的心跳加快，汗水開始滲出，我發(fā)現(xiàn)甚至很難和她說話。
在派對進行到一半的時候，當我的數(shù)據(jù)顯示正常時，她喝醉了，轉(zhuǎn)向我，面對面，看著我的眼睛，問她能不能吻我。
什么鬼
兩個小家伙出現(xiàn)在我的肩膀上，開始喃喃自語，我驚呆了，我在腦海里重演了這一幕，只是為了確定，她又問了一遍“我可以嗎?”
我的膝蓋發(fā)軟了，“當然可以，”我是如此渴望這樣的事情發(fā)生，我?guī)缀鹾ε聫奈易炖镎f出的話，帶著奇怪的決心和沉重的心情，我說“不”。
沒錯，我拒絕了我夢寐以求的女孩(真是個白癡，對吧?)
她說她喝得太多了，一旦她恢復清醒狀態(tài)，可能就無法接受了。她很難過，試圖繼續(xù)，但我不為所動。
我肩上的小家伙(穿紅衣服的那個)拿出火箭筒，把我的頭打飛了。
PS：第二天，在向她還原事件過程后，她罵了我，說我不應該拒絕這個機會。
編輯：因為每個人都在問這個問題，那么（后續(xù)是）這個吻從來沒有發(fā)生過，而且這件事已經(jīng)過去四年了，所以現(xiàn)在沒有希望了!

Anonymous
Identifying my brother's body. He was 17, I was 16.
On Friday it will have been exactly 8 years ago that he took his own life. I got up one morning to wake up my older brother for school, but he wasn't in his room. I looked outside and his car was gone too. It was a green two-door saturn with these ridiculous electric seatbelts that would slide into place automatically. He loved that crappy little car. We tried his cell phone and it rang, but he didn't pick up and we didn't hear it anywhere in the house.
My mother and I did not know what to do so we went to school to the counselor's office where we called the police and filed a missing persons report. I went to my classes that morning anyway because I thought school would distract me. Instead, I was filled with agony. My teachers were warned beforehand that I was having a "tough" morning. Worst of all was my third period English class where I got a call to come back to the counselor's office-- they had found his car parked by the Golden Gate Bridge and a tourist had found his cell phone simply lying on the ledge.
I honestly don't know what I did for the next two days other than that I didn't go to school. I don't remember; my memories of the next 43 hours is a mess. The next lucid moment I had was when they called us again. His body had washed up on the shore of Kirby Cove. A family camping there for Thanksgiving found him. His body was mottled different colors but mostly gray. His body was swollen and still looked contorted even though he was lying flat. He broke his neck in the fall and the currents of the bay had mangled his limbs.
I begged my mother to have him cremated and not buried in a casket. I still cry at the thought of my older brother packed away in a box (that is still how I think of coffins).

辨認我哥哥的尸體——他17歲，我16歲。
到星期五，他自殺已經(jīng)是整整8年前了。一天早上，我起床叫醒哥哥去上學，但他沒在房間里。我向外看去，他的車也不見了——是一輛綠色的雙門土星（SATURN），帶著這些可笑的電動安全帶，可以自動滑動到位。他喜歡那輛破舊的小汽車。我們試著打他的手機，手機響了，但他沒有接，我們在家里任何地方都沒有聽到。
我母親和我不知道該怎么辦，所以我們?nèi)チ藢W校輔導員辦公室，在那里我們報了警并提交了失蹤人員報告。不管怎樣，那天早上我去上課了，因為我覺得學校會分散我的注意力。相反，我充滿了痛苦。我的老師們事先就被通知關于我今天早上會很“難熬”的事情。最糟糕的是我的第三節(jié)英語課，我接到一個電話，要我回到輔導員辦公室——他們發(fā)現(xiàn)他的車停在金門大橋旁，一名游客發(fā)現(xiàn)他的手機就躺在橋架上。
老實說，我不知道接下來的兩天我做了什么，我沒有去上學。我不記得了；我對接下來43個小時的記憶一團糟。我的下一個清醒時刻是他們再次給我們打電話。他的尸體被沖到了柯比灣的岸邊。一個在那里露營過感恩節(jié)的家庭發(fā)現(xiàn)了他。他的身體有各種顏色的斑點，但大部分是灰色的。他的身體腫脹，即使平躺著，看起來仍然扭曲。他摔斷了脖子，海灣的水流也把他的四肢弄得血肉模糊。
我懇求母親把他火化，而不是埋在棺材里。一想到哥哥被裝進棺材，我就會哭(我對棺材的看法仍然是這樣)。

It's been 8 years but somehow I still have not been able to bring myself to go to the Golden Gate Bridge. If I have to go North, I ALWAYS drive around. I wish I was stronger. I miss you so so much. Every year on your birthday we manage to celebrate who you were and we toast to you and I feel stronger and then suddenly it's November and my heart breaks over and over again.
4 March 2017: Wow, I’m overwhelmed at the kind responses I’ve received to this answer. We had a really close brother/sister relationship and I want to thank you for all your warm sympathies. They feel genuine and I am so touched. I came back to this answer because it was my brother’s birthday two weeks ago— he would have been 29. It fell on a Saturday this year and my husband and I went to the Golden Gate Bridge.
We live in the Presidio and we love to stroll or ride our bikes in GG Park on weekends. That day, my husband looked at me and without saying a word, we both knew what we were about to do. We walked into Marin County, holding hands, and I just told my husband all the old stories I hadn’t talked about in forever— all the sentimental and goofy things we did as kids and teenagers: skipping class to get egg salad sandwiches from the deli, jumping off swings until I had the breath knocked out of me, the time I had the flu and he washed my hair for me, his propensity for gum which he would always grab out of my backpack, the way he used to prank me in high school by putting random things in my locker.
I did end up crying after we’d crossed the Bridge, but to be honest, only because all I had were good memories of him. I cried because I was so happy to have remembered all these beautiful things we shared as kids and teenagers. Walking across the Bridge earlier last month made me realize it’s more important to remember the good things than to be weighed down by the sad. Looking back now I realize that the difference between now and then, when my grieving process was the hardest, is that at the time I felt like through his death I had lost a huge part of myself; now I feel like I’ve taken a small piece of him with me to keep living, through me.
Thank you for reading.

8年過去了，但不知怎么的，我還是沒能讓自己去金門大橋。如果我必須去北方，我總是開車四處走走。我希望自己能更堅強。我太想你了。每年在你生日那天，我們都會給你慶祝，我們?yōu)槟愀杀?，我感覺更堅強了，然后突然到了11月，我的心一次又一次地碎了。
2017年3月4日：哇，我被收到的這些善意的回應感動了。我們的兄弟姐妹關系非常親密，我要感謝你們所有熱情的慰問。他們感覺很真誠，我很感動。我之所以寫出這個回答，是因為兩周前是我哥哥的生日——他應該29歲了。今年的一個星期六，我和丈夫去了金門大橋。
我們住在普雷西迪奧，周末喜歡在GG公園散步或騎自行車。那天，我丈夫看著我，二話不說，我們都知道我們要做什么。我們手牽著手走進馬林縣，我給我丈夫講了所有我很久沒說過的老故事——所有我們小時候和十幾歲時做過的傷感和愚蠢的事情:：逃課去熟食店買雞蛋沙拉三明治，跳秋千直到我喘不過氣來，有一次我得了流感，他給我洗了頭發(fā)，他喜歡從我的背包里拿口香糖，高中時他經(jīng)常惡作劇，把隨機性的東西放進我的儲物柜里。
我們過橋后，我確實哭了，但說實話，那只是因為我對他只有美好的回憶。我哭了，因為我很高興能想起我們小時候和十幾歲時分享的所有美好的東西。上個月早些時候走過這座橋讓我意識到，記住美好的事情比被悲傷壓垮更重要。現(xiàn)在回想起來，我意識到現(xiàn)在和當時的不同，當時我的悲傷過程是最艱難的，當時我覺得他的去世，讓失去了自己的很大一部分；我覺得我?guī)ё吡怂囊恍〔糠?，通過我來繼續(xù)生活。
感謝你的閱讀。

Kathy Hurst Davis
Telling my 11 year old son that I had cancer.
This was the hardest thing ever. After that, here are some more:
Personally:
A month later telling him that I had a different cancer.
Six years later, telling him that it was back.
Standing with my cousin as she was forced to take her son off life support after a motorcycle wreck at the age of 14. Helping her decide to have him be an organ donor.
One year later, talking to my son in Iraq, right after his father-in-law was injured in a car wreck. Going outside into the hallway to be alone while my son asked me to tell him the truth. I had to tell him that his father-in-law would not live but that they had not told my daughter-in-law this, yet. The doctors wanted to get her husband (my son) back from Iraq to be with her.
Listening to the pain and anguish as my son cried over the phone at the loss of the only real dad he had ever known.
Picking my son up at the airport a few days later.
Standing in the room with my son and his wife, who I couldn't love more if she was my own daughter, to support them while they removed her father from life support.
Taking care of my mother when she had dementia.
Holding my mother as she died.

告訴我11歲的兒子我得了癌癥。
這是有史以來最艱難的事情。在那之后，這里有更多:
就我個人而言：
一個月后告訴他我得了另一種癌癥。
六年后，告訴他癌癥回來了。
14歲時，我的堂姐在摩托車失事后被迫讓兒子拔掉生命維持系統(tǒng)。幫她決定讓他做器官捐獻者。
一年后，就在我兒子的岳父在一場車禍中受傷后，我和在伊拉克的他談話。當我兒子讓我告訴他真相時，我走到外面的走廊里獨自一人。我不得不告訴他，他的岳父活不下去了，但他們還沒有把這件事告訴我兒媳。醫(yī)生想讓她的丈夫(我的兒子)從伊拉克回來陪她。
聽著兒子在電話里悲痛欲絕地哭泣，因為他失去了自己唯一真正的父親。
幾天后去機場接我兒子。
和我的兒子和他的妻子站在房間里，如果她是我自己的女兒，我再愛她不過了，當他們把她父親的生命維持設備移走時，我支持他們。
我曾在我母親患癡呆時照顧她。
抱著我母親，看著她死去。

Professionally:
Working in the ER one night when they brought in a young man who fell asleep and drove into the back of a truck. At that time, everyone in a wreck was brought to the ER to be pronounced. This young man didn't have a scratch anywhere except for his head. There was nothing left of his head except the back of his skull and one ear. I had to stop his father from running into the room to see him. He spoke another language. I had to explain through an interpreter. I had to prepare this man that he would not be able to see his son's face. I then went back into the room and arranged a towel over the head and brought the father in to say his last goodbye.
Working in OB, meeting a friend who was pregnant with twins as she got off the elevator right after finding out that one of the babies was dead.
Taking care of another friend from high school who lost her baby. Cleaning up her beautiful stillborn son, dressing him, and taking him to her and her husband to both meet and say goodbye. (I got in tons of trouble. This was 28 years ago, and things were much different. I broke all kinds of rules that were in place at that time. I have no regrets.)

職業(yè)方面：
在急診室工作的某天晚上，他們送來了一個睡著的年輕人，他開車撞上了一輛卡車的后部。當時，所有遇難者都被帶到急診室接受治療。這個年輕人除了頭，什么地方都沒有被刮傷。除了后腦勺和一只耳朵，他的頭上什么都沒有了。我不得不阻止他父親跑進房間看他。他說另一種語言。我不得不通過翻譯進行解釋。我不得不讓這個人做好準備，讓他看不到兒子的臉。然后我回到房間，在其頭上蓋了一條毛巾，把父親帶了進來——向他做最后的告別。
在產(chǎn)科工作，去見一個懷著雙胞胎的朋友，當她發(fā)現(xiàn)其中一個嬰兒死亡后馬上下了電梯。
照顧另一個失去孩子的高中朋友。給她漂亮的死胎兒子清洗干凈，給他穿好衣服，然后帶他去見她和她的丈夫，和他們道別。（我遇到了很多麻煩。這是28年前的事了，當時的情況大不相同。我違反過當時所有的規(guī)定，但我不后悔。）

Anonymous
When I was 5 months into my first pregnancy we found out that the baby had such an extreme case of genital deformation that there would never be a chance of having a sexual life; in fact the deformations were so severe that they couldn't even confirm the gender. The baby had a non-functioning bladder fused on the outside of the stomach, which would mean that a catheter would have to be used to urinate. Internal sexual organs were affected as well. My husband and I spent 2 weeks meeting with specialists to confirm the diagnosis and listen to various life options and best/worst case scenarios. It looked very bleak to us as most people with this specific condition commit suicide or attempt to commit suicide when they are in their teens or later in life. Just meeting with the doctors was difficult because you had to ask a lot of hard questions and try not to cry as you heard the answers. And of course we kept wanting to hear that the condition wasn't so bad after all, but that didn't happen.
My husband and I did not want to put a person through an entire life of psychological pain and torment. We don't think that as parents you can "love the pain away". We made the decision to end the pregnancy and I had an abortion. It was very difficult to have to tell the doctor to end your baby's life. We do not regret our decision.
I'm sharing this story because I know there are other people out there who have to make hard decisions like this. I am thankful that I live in a country where I am able to make that choice.

當我第一次懷孕5個月時，我們發(fā)現(xiàn)孩子的生殖器畸形非常嚴重，以至于永遠沒有機會過性生活；事實上，畸形非常嚴重，他們甚至無法確認性別。嬰兒的胃外側有一個膀胱無法正常工作，這意味著必須使用導管排尿。內(nèi)臟性器官也受到影響。我和丈夫花了兩周時間與專家會面，以確認診斷結果，并聽取各種關于生活選擇和最佳/最壞情況。在我們看來，這非常令人沮喪，因為大多數(shù)患有這種特殊疾病的人在十幾歲或以后的生活中都會自殺或試圖自殺。光是和醫(yī)生見面就很困難，因為你必須問很多棘手的問題，而且在聽到答案時盡量不要哭。當然，我們一直希望聽到“情況并沒有那么糟糕”的回復，但這并沒有發(fā)生。
我丈夫和我不想讓一個人的一生都經(jīng)歷心理上的痛苦和折磨。我們認為作為父母，不可以“用愛來消除痛苦”。我們決定終止妊娠，我墮胎了。不得不告訴醫(yī)生“結束孩子的生命”這個決定是非常困難的，我們不后悔我們的決定。
我之所以分享這個故事，是因為我知道還有其他人必須做出這樣的艱難決定。我很感激我生活在一個我能夠做出選擇的國家。